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"Ever since the franchise wars..." - Tkil [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Tkil

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"Ever since the franchise wars..." [Dec. 7th, 2003|10:10 pm]
Tkil
[mood |Paranoid]
[music |Big Sonic Chill (http://www.fm949sd.com/station/chill.cfm)]

Forwarded from a neighbor:

I’ve done a slight bit of editing for sanity, but I’m inclined to believe that this did not originate with an American English speaker; there are some odd phrasings in there that remind me more of Queen’s English...

Granted, the problems highlighted by this are not limited to Americans (and the UK has actually had a national ID card scare more recently than we have), but there is a tendency to blame the USA for all the evils of huge corporations.

Operator Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your...
Customer Hello, can I order...
Operator Can I have your multi purpose card number first, Sir?
Customer It’s eh... hold on... 6102049998-45-54610
Operator OK... you’re... Mr Sheehan and you’re calling from 17 Meadow Drive. Your home number is 494-2366, your office 745-2302 and your mobile is 014-266-2566. Which number are you calling from now Sir?
Customer Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?
Operator We are connected to the system, Sir.
Customer May I order your Seafood Pizza...
Operator That’s not a good idea, Sir.
Customer How come?
Operator According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level, Sir.
Customer What?... What do you recommend then?
Operator Try our Low Fat Soybean Yogurt Pizza. You’ll like it.
Customer How do you know for sure?
Operator You borrowed a book entitled Popular Soybean Yogurt Dishes from the National Library last week, Sir.
Customer OK I give up... Give me three family sized ones then, how much will that cost?
Operator That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is $49.99.
Customer Can I pay by credit card?
Operator I’m afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is over the limit and you’re owing your bank $3720.55 since October last year.
Operator That’s not including the late payment charges on your housing loan, Sir.
Customer I guess I have to run to the neighborhood ATM and withdraw some cash before your guy arrives.
Operator You can’t, Sir. Based on the records, you’ve reached your daily limit on machine withdrawal today.
Customer Never mind just send the pizzas, I’ll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?
Operator About 45 minutes, Sir, but if you can’t wait you can always come and collect it on your motorcycle...
Customer What the...?
Operator According to the details in system, you own a Harley,...registration number E1123...
Customer @#%/$@&?#
Operator Better watch your language, Sir. Remember on 15th July 1987 You were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman...
Customer [Speechless]
Operator Is there anything else, Sir?
Customer Nothing... by the way... aren’t you giving me those 3 free bottles of Pepsi as advertised?
Operator We normally would Sir, but based on your records you’re also diabetic...
linkReply

Comments:
[User Picture]From: junglistgrl16
2003-12-08 11:05 am (UTC)
Ahhh that's creepy. Soon they'll own us all!!!!!
(Reply) (Thread)