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the rabbit speaks much truth [Jun. 14th, 2005|11:25 pm]
[Tags|, , ]
[mood |pensivepensive]
[music |Apoptygma Berzerk - Harmonizer - Detroit Tickets]

Only those with the courage to present their full, flawed selves to someone else get to have the kind of love that people write songs about. The rest, the ones that would prefer to hide, to borrow other people's things, to stay out of reach, to foster illusion, are destined to hear statements that they know are empty. They hear the same love songs, and like to think that such sweet words apply to them, but they know deep down inside that they don't. Their lovers are not the ones who look into their eyes and say, "I love you, flaws and all." Their lovers mutter their devotion as they walk past them, toward the door.
To the point where reading it makes me physically uncomfortable... which tells me that I need to pay more attention.

And/or drink more. Guess which is on the agenda for tonight?

[User Picture]From: el_bertrando
2005-06-16 07:46 pm (UTC)
No physical symptoms here, my brain is in denial of ever having read it...whatever it was.
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[User Picture]From: deliriumdreams
2005-06-17 01:41 pm (UTC)
I finally got around to reading the rabbit. And yes, that quote is particularly painful. It's easier to show the people we care about our good qualities and play down our "bad" ones. But I think she's right and that if we bare our flaws, rather than hiding parts of ourselves, we can find people who love us not inspite of our flaws, but because of them. (And no, that doesn't mean I'm all that comfortable exposing them for all to see, especially not all at once.)

But I think the quote that hit home even more so for me was from the person who wrote in...

I tell myself that he KNOWS I love him. This dude can read me like a flashcard. He must know it.

It sounds so much worse when she wrote it than it does in my head. "Of COURSE he knows how I feel, he's a bright boy. DUH!" It's so much easier to assume someone knows how I feel, that I don't have to talk about it. I don't think it's the powerplay rabbit talks about. (Although I have been very very very guilty of that in the past.) I can over intellectualize and rationalize and say that the word love is so over used in our culture that saying them to another person can be trite and meaningless. But of course I have no problem saying "I love you" to jettdelirium. (Granted it took years to get there and she did say it FIRST.) But really, I think I'm just generally uncomfortable talking about any real emotions. As a matter of fact, it's easier for me to talk about emotions here or in an IM then it is face to face with someone. I wonder what the rabbit would say about that.
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